blogging again

last night I had a conversation with a friend who encoujraged me to start blogging again. I guess lately sitting in the "library" and penning a few phrases here and there just hasn't seemed appealing. I think of somethihng to say, and it just seems like I don't have the energy to really construct it into something meaningful. Or even slightly un-meaningful....anyway...for steve's birthday (which is next week) we got him a refurbished laptop with wireless so he can be like all the other cool hip kids at school.:) He can also do some homework in the living room which is nice. He doesn't feel as cut off then from everything.
Anyway, I got the great idea of combining my saturday morning romp to Panera (my weekly alone time) with blogging on steve's laptop! So maybe you will here from me more occasionally (no promises of course)

I used to talk a lot about dreamy stuff and how writing on this blog I could connect. Connect to the outside world. Or while I was alone...if I was with nature, I was actually not alone...but through the energy of life we were all connected together. You know...our experiences, our mutual aloneless, our ability to take pleasure in life wheverever it exists....THIS is what makes us NOT alone.
Perhaps I am lookinjg at a tree right now, that you once looked at, and took pleasure in. Or perhaps right now you too are feeling that cool breeze that whips your hair out of place. You are experiencing (at least here in OK) that same change of season...those changes that make us realize that everything is fleeting, and make us so afraid and excited at the same time.

The truth is...I don't feel alone as much as I used to. I have fallen to the ranks of those other mundane women who have no time for contemplation because of the routine of life. I find pleasure in working. I find frustration in a dirty house which never seems to stay clean with so many people and animals in the same place. I am a part of that trivial world which I once mocked and yet longed for. My brain has been lulled to sleep, and sometimes I am proud to be one of the suburban robots, and sometimes begin to loathe it.

So, I will say that Steve going back to school has brought some of my old interests to the forefront. I am reading more, and I am working very hard at increasing my german fluency. German Club, and my German program is really taking off in a lot of ways, and the funny thing is I LOVE it. I stay late at school now at least two days a week to tutor kids. I somehow no longer abhor and detest the building.(at least not every day) Steve talking about education all the time makes me reflect and thing about the way I teach, and I think I am possibly becoming better because of it. I wrote a grant last month which if I get it (keep your fingers crossed and your prayer caps on!) I will get a smart board, and a bunch of new texts for my spring AP class.

Well, I will probably say a fond farewell for now. I know from experience that a post that is too long doesn't get read, and you probably stopped reading a couple paragraphs ago anyway. Go out and enjoy the day! You might miss the season if you don't keep your eyes popped open and alert...winter will weave its way here before we know it.

Love you all,
sweet t